Caroline's Blog

the church of 80% sincerity

The Church of 80% Sincerity was founded by David Roche because we get it right only about 80% of the time. As Roche explains, 80% is as good as it gets and we have to accept that. We understand 80% of the truth we encounter, believe about 80% of it, act according to our beliefs 80% of the time.

I didn't think much of the church when I first read about it but lately, I'm starting to think that David Roche is both prophetic and profound which is evangelical parlance for 'he's right!'

I've never liked John Calvin because of Calvinism and TULIP. My pastor once answered a question I had with an extended quote from John Calvin and I dismissed the whole explanation summarily because I did not like the man. My pastor was shocked because, to him, Calvin was a brilliant theologian and the answer he gave me was the best one he had.

Now that I know about the Church of 80% Sincerity, I can appreciate Calvin. He was wrong about atonement being limited because Christ Jesus died for the sins of all people. But he was right about God's unconditional election and irresistible grace meeting us in our total depravity and about God preserving us against everything. Calvin should not have burnt all those people at the stake for disagreeing with him but I like him a whole lot better because of the grace I found in the Church of 80% Sincerity.

Martin Luther was a great reformer who brought an end to certain church excesses and abuses. He also rediscovered the doctrine that salvation is by grace alone through faith. For a man who believed so much in grace, in unmerited favour, he should not have been so virulently anti-semitic. I'm convinced his attitude affected the Lutheran church and Germany. He would fit in perfectly at the Church of 80% Sincerity.

Martin Luther King was also a great reformer, a hero of our times, but he cheated on his wife and plagiarized some people. He had a dream that he laboured into reality because he believed in the greatness of God, the rightness of love and that justice will prevail. I do not judge him by the colour of his skin or by the content of his character. He belongs in the Church of 80% Sincerity. So would Mahatma Gandhi, another reformer who followed the way of love and non-violence. He rejected Christianity and he drank urine but, at the Church of 80% Sincerity, no one would look at him funny.

N.T. Wright is one of our best living theologian but at a series of lectures at Leicestershire (July 14-16, 2004), he said about a third of what he teaches is probably false; the only problem is that he didn't know which third. Now, if he had 80% truth in his theology and if he could only communicate that 80% of the time, that means we would receive 64% or approximately two-thirds truth when we listen to him. N.T. Wright must be a secret member of the Church of 80% Sincerity.

Hell

Jesus spoke more about hell than anyone else in the bible....or did he?

The word "hell" occurs 15 times in my NIV bible , 13 of those times in Jesus' sermons. Jesus' audience, first century Jews, did not have the same concept of hell - a hellish place of fire and brimstone, eternal damnation and eternal conscious punishment - as we do. They believed that people went to Gehenna when they died and there their souls are purged and purified before they enter heaven. Gehenna is the word Jesus used and the word that got translated as "hell" in our bibles.

My pastor once told us of the time his 9 year old son went to camp. After one week, they got back a dirt encrusted stranger. They ran a hot bath and scrubbed and washed and scrubbed and washed until something recognizable emerged. "Ah, there you are my son!" he exclaimed.

Now that I know Judaism does not have a concept of hell and other places of eternal damnation, I can picture a different ending for the people who bloated up and died of snake venom near Edom or who puked their guts out and died while eating quail at Kibroth Hattaavah.

I think they all ended up in Gehenna where the LORD tossed them into hot steam rooms until they started to sweat toxins. Then He thrashed them thoroughly with hyssop and birch branches and steamed them even some more. Then He pushed up His sleeves and pounded and kneaded, stretched and folded them into artistic pretzel and origami shapes to loosen them up. Then He slapped them face down on thin mats and commanded His angels to walk all over them. Many a hardened sinner has turned white as a ghost and muttered, "Oh dear G_d"  when they saw the size of the angel coming purposefully toward them.

God would walk around, supervising and nodding approval and has been known to pounce on an unsuspecting sinner, wrenching his neck around and cracking 15 or 16 vertebrae into position and moving on before the victim can let out a scream. Meanwhile, his angel would continue to walk up and down nonchalantly as if this was a very common occurrence.

Then the sinners are tossed into vats of hot water and long, drawn out groans would echo around the room. Aaaaahhhhhh!!! Ooooooohhhhh!! and Ooooooooooo. They would alternate between soaking limply and blasting through energetic wash-and-spin cycles which involved all sorts of detergents, soaps and shampoos. The light-hearted work songs of the angels running the water and soap systems added to the surrealness of the whole experience.

Finally, God dips them in a cool water rinse, flips them inside out, wrings out their innards, snaps them right way up with a practiced flick of His wrists and stands them on their feet. And then He says with absolute delight, "Ah, there you are, my children!"

More Christian Myths

Myth: God answers all our prayers; He says yes, no or wait.

God speaks to us all the time and He says a lot more than just yes, no or wait. This reduces God to less than the Magic 8 Ball which has 20 possible answers. If we only expect Him to say 'yes, no or wait', we'll miss all that He has to say to us.

Myth: Be careful what you pray for, you might get it.

This plus the "don't pray for patience" advice are prayer killers. It makes God sound like the divine Monkey Paw where all your ardent heart desires are answered in such horrific ways that it makes you wish you had never wished for anything at all. Not a good way to foster an intimate prayer life.

Myth: You know you're doing God's will if you meet with lots of opposition, setbacks and suffering.

Then how do we know when we're not doing God's will? When everything is just perfect and we're meeting with success after success?

A lot of needless suffering could be avoided with a good grounding in spiritual warfare. I have the privilege of being mentored by one of the best in this area. He has taught me prayers of protection and prayers against retaliation. He has taught me how to discern God's will and the necessity of keeping one foot on earth and one foot in heaven. Best of all, he taught me that when people hear God, they feel everything is urgent, imperative and must be done NOW because there is a timelessness in the spiritual realm. This is a common error and the source of much grief.

From a comment by Deb:
Another one that gets thrown in my face is "You can be sure that you're serving where God wants you if you really hate it; because God makes sure you have to depend on Him and can't possibly take any glory for yourself." Where do people get these ideas? Why would God waste all that effort to endow me with talents and a love of one kind of work/service and direct me to do something I have no heart or skills to carry out?

the last word and the word after that

There are 2 groups of questions regarding homosexuality in the commentary section of Brian McLaren's new book, The Last Word and The Word After That. The book is primarily about hell and homosexuality is a very minor side point. These questions are McLaren's 'answer' to the gay question but they are not rhetorical so I'm going to give them a whirl.

One set is for the conservative and one for the liberal. Since some Christians call me liberal and some conservative, I'll answer both sets.

For the liberal:
How do you recommend we decide what is right or wrong sexually? Does "anything go," and if not, how do we decide how to identify any sexual behavior as wrong - on what basis?

I would base my decision primarily on whether the behaviour hurts the persons involved. I can limit it to the people involved because sex is a private thing. If it was a public act, then public sentiments and morals should be taken into account. One of our Prime Ministers said the government has no business in the nation's bedrooms.

What are the personal and social consequences of a lack of moral clarity on sexual issues, and how can those consequences be avoided or dealt with?

The same way we handle free speech. We all agree free speech is a good thing but we don't let people yell 'fire!' in a crowded theatre or make bomb threats or promote hate. We have laws against false advertising, slander, libel and perjury. We may have difficulty deciding what is pornography and what is art and what is just bad taste but we know when someone has crossed the line as in child pornography.  Free speech serves our free society and we are able to regulate it so that it is helpful and not harmful. It's not a perfect situation but we do okay. I think we can trust ourselves to handle sex with the same common sense.

And if you accept and affirm gay people, how will you deal with those whose consciences will not allow them to do so? Does your acceptance of gays require a rejection of those who do not agree with you, and if not, how will the difference be dealt with?

I do worship and will continue to worship with those who disagree with me. Perhaps we may need to agree to disagree, to revisit hot topics only occassionally and dwell instead on our common ground, Jesus Christ, and all that means. Love covers a multitude of sins.

For the conservative:
How do you believe homosexual people should be treated? Should they be constantly shamed? Made to live in secret or hiding? Deprived of basic human rights, equal pay, housing, and so on? Accepted, but on some second-class status that would treat them differently from other people? And if you cannot accept homosexual people in your midst, can you accept those who do, or must you reject (on some level) both homosexual people and those who accept them?

It can not be denied that homosexuality is anathema in the bible. Paul said to avoid sexual sins and he had a Judaic idea of sexual morality. Our soul/spirit becomes attached to anyone we have sex with. C.S. Lewis said few things we do involve our whole person (spirit, soul & body) and sex is one of them. It is a powerful act that opens up gateways in the spiritual realm. It is this mysterious spiritual element to sex that makes it so wonderful when two people are in love and so devastating when it is forced on someone.

I also believe in social justice and Canadians believe in peace, order and good government. In our social contract, we approach each group and say we may not be brothers but we can live together as neighbours.  Justice is not just for us and it is in all our interest to make sure every group is treated justly. For our social contract, I would propose that all rights enjoyed by members of our society - from protection against hate to marriage - should be extended to gay people. As in all social contracts, there are the opt out clauses. I propose that churches be allowed to opt out of performing or blessing gay marriages.

Would I prefer gay marriages be called same sex unions? Yes, I think that would be more palatable to Canadian society and yes I'm aware of the objections to that. Should Christian businesses (printers, caterers, wedding planners) be allowed to opt out? I say no. I know that will be extremely unpopular. But they can no more be exempt than Christian funeral homes, doctors and real estate agents. As part of the social contract, I hope gay people will agree it makes more sense to use gay friendly businesses especially for something as significant as a wedding!

___________

Having worked through this exercise, all I can say is that I'm glad I'm not as widely reaad as Brian nor am I a leader of a church and a movement!!! Phew!

Here's to blessed obscurity.

Christian Myths

Myth: God will never give you more than you can handle.

All of life is more than I can handle which is why I need a Saviour - every day of my life. This myth puts failure and despair squarely on the shoulders of the struggling person. We blithely toss this anchor to drowning people, thinking it will encourage them to keep paddling. We fill our churches, bookstores and airwaves with testimonies of triumphs but we never talk about those who never made it to the end of the tunnel, who lost their faith or their lives. Victories are public celebrations, failures are private shame.

The Apostle Paul had a thorn in his flesh, a messenger from Satan. Three times he prayed to God to remove it but God said no, He won't remove it, but Paul has His presence and His grace which is enough and that, somehow, makes everything okay. I suspect a lot of people have been called to discover what that means.

Myth: What does not kill you will make you stronger.

That which does not kill me will probably give me post traumatic stress disorder. Wounds have been cut into my soul which is why I need a healer. What facades do we force each other to wear after a storm has blown through our lives?

Jesus said, let the little children come to me, do not hinder them. A bruised reed he will not break and a smouldering flame he will not put out. Let's stop being adults for a while and just sit in the arms of our gentle Healer.

Myth: Christians have it harder than non-Christians.

Shit happens and I'd rather go through tough times holding His hand than to go through the same tough times on my own. I need a comforter.

"Are you tired? Worn out? Burned out on religion? Come to me. Get away with me and you'll recover your life. I'll show you how to take a real rest. Walk with me and work with me - watch how I do it. Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. I won't lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you. Keep company with me and you'll learn to live freely and lightly." Jesus Christ.

Myth: It is God's will

Some Christians believe that everything that happens is God's will, and if God is not in control of one molecule in the universe, then He is not God. While I admire their high regard for God's sovereignty, I can't help wondering what they have done with free will.

When scientists studied the weather, they found the system so complex and chaotic, they posited that a butterfly fluttering its wings in New Mexico can cause a snow storm in New York. Everything that happens today is the result of free willed choices made by us and other spiritual beings. We have sinned and we've been sinned against. While God honours these choices by letting them play out in time and space, He works within them to bring the best possible out of each situation.

Myth: You have to fix yourself.

A friend of mine is very fond of saying that whenever she is exhorting us to sin less and be more Christlike. There is a whole slate of stuff we are suppose to be doing: confess, worship, pray, read, give and, most of all, - Stop Sinning.

But these are the images the bible gives me:

• abiding and remaining in Him like a branch on a vine
• drinking from Him and streams of water flowing from me
• laying myself down as a living sacrifice

It's all about being and not doing. Somehow we got the idea that we're suppose to fix ourselves when we've sinned so that we can restore our relationship with God. Some even feel too ashamed to pray or come to God when their lives are a mess.

I believe we have to come to Him in the midst of our failure and simply surrender to His grace. It is He who works in us to will and act according to His good purpose. We are not our saviour. We are not even co-saviours with Christ. We just have to trust He can save us in the midst of our broken lives.

Christian Myth II

God has prepared the perfect spouse for you and you will meet him/her at just the right time

I've challenged people to prove that biblicallly. Most often, women in my cell group will cite Psalm 37:4 "Delight yourself in the Lord and he will give you the desires of your heart." and the other women will chorus, "the Lord!" right after they finish reading the verse. I've trained them well.

My favourite is the one D. gave me from Isaiah 34:16 "Look in the scroll of the LORD and read: None of these will be missing, not one will lack her mate. For it is his mouth that has given the order, and his Spirit will gather them together."

I didn't have the heart to tell her what the context of that verse is.

Dark Things

I was talking to my pastor about what makes a person Christian. Recently, I've been thinking that being saved and being a Christian are two different things although I've always been taught that they are the same. The general theory is that we're all born separated from God and destined for hell but if we accept Jesus as our savior, we become Christians and we're saved. As Christians, we can get baptized, join a Baptist church and go to heaven.

My pastor, who has a doctorate in theology, would be mortified by the above caricature of his life's mission but, hey, he doesn't read this blog.

I was nineteen when someone finally told me the bad news, uh, I mean the Good News. Because of my sins, I was separated from God by a bottomless, uncrossable abyss. She drew it all out for me on a piece of paper. She even sketched my pathetic attempts to bridge the gap. Then she told me Jesus died for my sins and I can cross over to God by using him as a bridge. This she pinned to the bulletin board above my desk. After about 6 months, I said the prayer, crossed the gap and got up from my knees, a changed person.

That is the nice tidy story I put on church membership forms. And the story I tell when I'm trying to convert someone to Christianity, to save them as I was once saved.

The following is the sidebar.

When I was a child, I went through a phase where I was terrified of that brief period between getting into bed and falling to sleep. It seems that when all was settled and quiet, a Dark Thing would rise up and fill the room with mind numbing fear. I knew that I would be okay if I could sing one of two songs in my head. I don't know how I know; I just knew.

One of the songs was Jesus Loves Me:

Jesus loves me, this I know
For the bible tells me so
Little ones to Him belong
We are weak but He is strong.

The other was Jesus Loves the Little Children

Jesus loves the little children
All the children of the world
Red and yellow, black and white
They are precious in His sight
Jesus loves the little children of the world.

And every time, just before I can think the songs, the Dark Thing will tell me that I will forget the words or I will get the songs mixed up. It will say very convincingly, "this time, it will not work." But every time, through mindless fear, I would start either of the songs in my head and it would always play perfectly to the end. And the Dark Thing would go away.

That was several decades ago. In the intervening years, I accepted Jesus Christ as Lord and Savior, became a Christian, logged many hours of church, bible reading and religious stuff. I know a lot more. But when I look back at that scared child in the dark, I wonder if I am any more saved than she was.

Dark Things II

To me, being a Christian means following Christ. It also means being indwelt by His Spirit. We are in Him and He is in us. Spiritual time-space is weird that way.

About a year after becoming a Christian, I was fully disgusted with my inability to walk the walk. It seems so easy. A few minutes bible reading, a few seconds prayer, tell anyone who asks, don't sin. What could be simpler?

I was a good and disciplined student. I was raised in a conservative Chinese family. Genetically and socially, I was predisposed to be obedient and to stay out of trouble. Working hard and delaying gratification was bred into my bones. Generations of ancestors had far more difficult duties.

But still....

So one night, I got on my knees and asked God to take away whatever it was inside me that was stopping me from doing the things that I ought to do and want to do. For some reason, I was convinced it was something inside me but it wasn't me. After praying a while, my prayer morphed into one phrase, "get out, get out, get out, get out..."

I saw a black thing that was my shape and size leap out of me and run out of the room.

I thought I was losing my mind so I went to bed.

Of course, you're all wondering if I became a paragon of Christian virtue after. The short answer is no, but I have less angst about it.